Words from my kids on today’s pressing issues, politics, sexual orientation, Hilary Clinton and more.

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The players (since my kids have requested that have blog names rather than initials)

My oldest, John, as in John Coffey from, The Green Mile, as he is my gentle giant. Large and frighteningly strong, beneath his giant exterior lies the sweetest, kindest teenage boy you’ll ever meet, who is deeply emotional and cares greatly for all his family and friends.

My middle child, Ramona, as in Ramona Quimby from the Beverly Cleary series. Like Ramona, my 9 year old daughter is a brilliant child, full of life and energy. She has personality on top of personality and there’s never a dull moment. Unfortunately, just like Ramona Quimby, this happy go lucky, walking to the beat of your own drummer life can sometimes come off as pesty behavior.

My youngest, Barney, as in Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother. It sounds horrible that I’m naming my toddler after such a character, but after searching and thinking, he’s the best match. To be blunt, my toddler, like others I’m sure, is a self-centered, spoiled, jerk. He is incredibly smart, sometimes too smart for me. He’s also got a sense of humor, smile and general love for life that makes you instantly love him. Like Barney, he uses his wit and charm to get everything he wants, and if that doesn’t work, well the entitled side is sure to come out.

So, now that you’ve met the cast, let’s get on with the show.

Barney on Body Image: With his gut proudly pushed out, “I love my big belly, when I eat, food goes there, then it gets even bigger.

Barney on Mom’s Body Image: “I love yous boobies mommy.” Thanks for the confidence boost kid, atleast someone does.

John on State Assistance: “The good life, just livin off the Government Tit.”

Ramona on Being Different: “Our pizza is the same, it just has different stuff on top.”

Ramona on Finances: (as a toddler)
Me: I don’t have any money.
Ramona: Neither do I, we’ll just use your credit card, that always has money.

Ramona on Abortion: “But, the baby can’t call the cops.”

Barney on the Power of Love:
Daddy or Mommy: Do you love me?
Barney: Nope.
When we’re going to the toy store.
Daddy or Mommy: Do you love me?
Barney: Yes, me love you. (followed by hugs and kisses)

Ramona Sexual Orientation¬† “So sometimes, boys kiss girls and girls kiss boys but then, boys kiss boys and girls kiss girls and that’s normal.”

Ramona on Christianity: “If everyone loved God then maybe everyone would love each other more.”

Ramona on Racism: “If I have brown skin and you have white skin and we’re the same then it doesn’t matter what color your skin is cause we’re all people anyways.”

Ramona on Hair: (after seeing a mohawk as a toddler) “I like motel better than mohawk because it’s tall like a motel and hawks aren’t really tall.”

John on Drugs: (after seeing a commercial about the effects of meth) “Uuggh, that guy really screwed up his life. Don’t people ever watch these videos?”

Hope you enjoyed, there’s always now where those came from.

Deana

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