No, really, locker chandeliers. That’s a thing now. They also sell locker rugs, ya know, so you can have a soft place to put your dirty gym shoes.

But really, convincing my daughter it isn’t reasonable to spend $100 on locker decorations is the least of my problems with middle school.

My daughter will be 11 tomorrow (she started school when she was 4 so she is young for her class) and she just started her first year of middle school. I try to be open with the things I let her wear and do because I know that in middle school things like what you wear and how your style your hair matter, even though they shouldn’t.

She doesn’t have a phone, but that is because I allowed her to have one and she proved she wasn’t ready. She does have a Kindle and so far she hasn’t lost that privilege.

However, there are some things it seems like all of her friends have that I won’t let her have. Some of these things are things she will never have (at least not until she has her own money or she stops growing). Things like Uggs and Birkenstocks… Idk about you, but I don’t see putting $200 into shoes that won’t fit her next year and would probably be ruined before then anyways.

But, there are some other things I could let her have but I am stuck between how I feel about this things.

These things are leggings (if you have followed my blog for a while,  you know my thoughts on leggings) and Instagram.

Let’s start with leggings. I don’t wear them. I will sometimes where sporty leggings (thicker one that aren’t see through and tight enough to show my labia) when I work out at home but I never wear those thin, black, one size fits all things that show off the inner workings of what’s between my legs and the color of my underwear. There are many reasons behind this. I have a post titled, Judge Me By My Clothing , you can read more about this there. I have  nothing against leggings for other people, in fact, they make for super cute outfits, but as for my household, I don’t feel they are appropriate. I have taught my daughter that it doesn’t matter what you look like and that she is beautiful  no matter what. And she has always believed that. However now that she is in middle school, clothes matter to her more than they used to. My husband and I had spent time talking to her about leggings throughout the summer and we had all agreed that she would not wear them unless they were under a dress, shirt long enough to cover her butt or shorts. But, school has started and many of her friends wear leggings and she wants to wear leggings as pants too. So, now I am stuck between wanting her to feel like she fits in and having her not dress in a way I feel is inappropriate. The thing about it is, right now, I know that her body isn’t developed, and really, there is  nothing that a pair of leggings is showing off. However, she is maturing and eventually those leggings will be showing off her body and I feel like it is better to start the habit of not wearing them now than in the future when it is a bigger deal. I bought her a pair of skinny, black jeggings. That’s what I wear and I thought it was a decent compromise, but it’s not what her friends are wearing so she doesn’t like them now.

And then there is Instagram. I myself just started one and it is the only social media I have. I keep it private, it’s not in my name and I am only friends with people I know. If my daughter were to have an Instagram, I would keep hers the same way and I would have her password. Most of her friends have one and some of them she follows through my page. Part of me thinks that Insta is innocent enough and that if I keep it how I mentioned above that it would be something fun for her to do with her friends. I also feel like it is a way for us to explore social media together so that when she is older and has more freedom, she will have a good set of rules for how to use social media and what not to do. However, the other part of me worries about what she will find when I’m not right there with her and also who  might  find her (namely her birth dad which would not be a good situation) Plus, it just seems like 11 is so young for social media.

Any one out there have experience with these things. I’d love opinions from moms and teens too. Please share with my what you think. And don’t worry, I’m not easily offended… I know my views on clothing aren’t always popular.

Advertisements